Move Over God, Jesus is in the House

November 17, 2010

I should write about suicide and sex all the time. They’re huge sellers. That being said, the honesty of yesterday’s post really freaked some people out. Initially it irritated me, but then I realized the reactions reflected our discomfort with honesty. We covet our feelings, our flaws and our desires for fear that others will judge us. Myself included.

Yesterday’s confession was three years late. Why? Because it’s easier to talk about things that are embarrassing or emotionally intense once they’re in the past. Way in the past.

In short, we’re often ashamed to be human, which is why I like Jesus. He encourages honesty and introspection. He also allows us to forgive ourselves for being human.

Unfortunately God gets all the glory. All I ever hear is “Dear God” or “Thank you Lord.” God is the one who brings people to their knees. Jesus heals. The Lord hates. Jesus loves. Jesus accepts. God damns. Jesus helped the poor. God damned them (at least in the beginning of the Old Testament, he did the same to foreigners).

Do people pray to Jesus? I’ve heard “In Jesus’ name,” but that doesn’t sound prayer-like to me.

Why does God get all of the kudos? Well, he’s older and we’re taught to respect our elders. He’s also very Hollywood. He loves special effects and doom and gloom. Jesus, on the otherhand, is like an Independent film. Listening to him takes patience. He offers substance.

Last night I tried praying — to Jesus, not God — and instead of peace, I had a horrific nightmare, woke up yelling, knocked water all over my side table and quintupled the width of my favorite short story collection. My hips, back and stomach also seized up, preventing me from cleaning the mess. The dream —family murdered, me living in a house of blood with an invisible killer that suffocated me from time to time — wasn’t what I was looking for, but it made me think. God may have delivered blood and guts, but I don’t know if he would have putt me in the house or subjected me to the invisible killer. Jesus did (maybe) and I’ve been analyzing both all day. How do they pertain to my life? Emotional state? Etc.

I like Jesus, but I think this is a farce: “When  you pray and ask for something, believe that you have received it, and you will be given whatever you ask for.”

When I sort of prayed, I did not expect physical and mental torture especially because my prayer was altruistic, which is uncommon. Is exorcism a common response to prayer? Is that why everyone prays to God instead of Jesus?

Well, I’ll give Jesus another shot. As for the Lord, adios Dios.

Stopping Point: Book of Luke

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11 Responses to “Move Over God, Jesus is in the House”

  1. Hey there, thanks for sharing your initial experience attempting to pray to Jesus. I know it might sound goofy, but I have an idea why you experienced what you did as I’ve experienced something similar in the past (not sure if commenting on the blog is the most appropriate place to share it though…)

  2. I had violent dreams last night too, but probably because I watched The Walking Dead before I went to sleep. (Disturbed the heck out of my wife.)

    I’m sorry about your struggles. That sounds like pity but is meant to be sympathy. Most of us have our skeletons–whether depression or addiction or whatever. I don’t share skeleton. My wife knows, but that’s about it. You are brave to share yours.

    That verse about praying for what you want… I don’t like it either. Darn stupid Jesus is always being tricky like that. The best reading I’ve heard brings the verse into context. Jesus says, Have faith in God and you can ask the mountain to throw itself into the sea. Somebody once told me that Jesus is referring to Mt. Sinai, saying in essence, Have faith in God and he will throw the law away. When you pray and ask for something [like grace], believe it.

    Or maybe that pastor or teacher was explaining away the parts of the Bible that he didn’t want to deal with.

    • thumpme said

      Hm. I haven’t seen the movie “The Walking Dead,” but I feel like I see a lot of that on the streets. It’s unfortunate, but it is what it is. I understand your thoughts about the praying thing. I was more hoping for someone else. I really understand what everyone is saying about having faith in God, but that’s really where the division is. Despite reading the Bible, I just don’t have it. Faith, I suppose. Well, in God at least. I do have faith in life and I really do enjoy much of the Bible. It’s certainly pertinent to life.

      Thanks for your support regarding my issues/challenges. I appreciate it. I’m actually doing very well. Writing is phenomenally cathartic for me. Can writing be a religion?

  3. I think we can split hairs. God hears our voice, our wails, our heart.

    But maybe there’s something else to what you are saying

    • thumpme said

      Yeah, we can split hairs. It’s difficult for me to really get into it because I’m a non-believer. I look at the Bible more as a…guidebook, life lessons, etc. I do appreciate you reading and expressing your thoughts. I always enjoy reading them.

  4. farlane said

    I had a similarly weird experience after I was “spiritually baptized” in Barbados. It was Jesus who came to my rescue.

    That didn’t turn me into a believer, but it did make me wonder just what power there is in belief.

    PS: Great blog! I read your feature on Lansing in Next American City (have it on Absolute Michigan today) and followed the Google here.

    • thumpme said

      Yes. There’s a hell of a lot of power in belief. Power makes me nervous period.

      Thanks for reading the blog. Cool UP pics. I agree with you about the ugly wind turbine debauchery as well.

  5. […] a version of the gospel. You can glean anything you want from any of them. I think Matthew is dry, Mark is dark and Luke is wonderful. His writing is interesting and he details good old family […]

  6. […] For five days, I had access to three guideposts — family, religion and the occult. They all said the same thing: Have faith. It will all work out. […]

  7. […] or consistent church services fairly difficult. However, I do remember some things. I remember that Jesus and maybe God, are supposed to be with me at all times. I think that’s crap not because I make dumb decisions […]

  8. […] version of the gospel. You can glean anything you want from any of them. I think Matthew is dry, Mark is dark and Luke is wonderful. His writing is interesting and he details good old family […]

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