Sticking to God or College? You’re Missing Out

September 20, 2010

In a game of Connect the Dots, the Bible creates a path between knowledge and wisdom, all roads leading to God. Higher education does the same, providing a knowledge/wisdom umbrella for the public to stand beneath while clinging to the idea of absorption by affiliation.

The Bible alone does not provide wisdom and higher education alone does not result in knowledge, yet people all over the world hope that by affixing themselves to one, they’ll leave the world smart and happy.

According to proverbs 1-15, I am incapable of being wise because I don’t believe in God. OK. We’ll work with that for a second.  Since anyone can believe in God, let’s look at how this might apply to social outcasts such as sexual offenders. Suppose half of the country’s sexual offenders and serial rapists believe in God. Technically, they’re on the road to wisdom, especially if they also happened to listen to their parents.

Part of the Bible’s road to wisdom requires kids to listen to their parents, to “do what you’re father tells you.”

Another proverb says:

“Son, pay attention to what your father and mother tell you. Their teaching will improve your character as a handsome turban or a necklace improves your appearance.”

According to conducted a study conducted by the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine’s William C. Holmes, “40 percent of sexual offenders and 76 percent of serial rapists report they were sexually abused as youngsters.”

I can’t imagine that every offender was molested by his/her parent however, it’s likely that several were. If a child molester believes in the Lord and follows the action of his parents, which happen to include molestation, is he/she wise? This gets a little messy.

So does knowledge and wisdom as defined by universities. In the U.S., “educated” generally means “has a college degree.” I am “educated.” My parents are not. When they were my age, they operated a very successful company. I am not. While they may be successful, I am knowledgeable. I was wise enough to pay a shit load of money for a piece of paper I’ve already lost and would never hang on my wall, they were not.

Because they missed the university, my parents didn’t have the resources to conduct wise research like this Michigan State University (MSU) study titled: “Spouses do not grow more alike, study finds.”

Because these researchers attended some university, adding lots of little dots and letters to the end of their names, they can do these types of things. After all, they’re paid to believe knowledge and wisdom directly lead to The University.

Hilariously, these proverbs promise deep, restful sleep for those who are wise. My insomnia doesn’t kick in after a rousing episode of Jersey Shore, it starts with a New Yorker article about the Haitian election; gathers steam fueled by Koch Industries; and, by the time the new gold rush hits, it eviscerates any chance of REM.

Clearly I was misled. I thought I was seeking knowledge by making judgments based on information from many sources when in fact, I should have been looking for a big, comfy umbrella.

Stopping Point: Proverbs 15-30

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